Recently we posted to the Facebook page asking our subscribers what their biggest concern was with their elderly family members living independently. The responses we got took two basic forms: one was from the perspective of a caregiver, and one was from the perspective of the senior or loved one themselves. Both of them are interesting to think about.

The response of the person who is thinking about the loved one is worried about maintaining their own independence and being a burden on others. That fear and anxiety has a real effect on their continued well-being at home, especially when there are both social (family) and financial factors at issue. There is always the fear of the unknown, and sometimes the question of the future along with potential unknown crises can be crippling.

The problem of the caregiver is no less vexing. The potential caregiver is usually already caring for other people and finds themselves “sandwiched” between multiple vulnerable generations. In addition, they are often trying to live their own lives. The additional burden of caring for family causes both a crisis of their own identity, and the guilt that they are not doing enough to live up to their imagined “duty” to act on behalf of their loved ones. It’s a very difficult spot to be squeezed into.

Some preliminary care planning is an easy and inexpensive way to allay some of these fears. It isn’t usually necessary to do whole-scale estate planning or manipulation of assets just to make sure the finances take care of themselves in the future. It also isn’t usually necessary to rearrange someone’s entire life at the conclusion of the planning just to make sure that a crisis won’t happen. Crises happen to everyone. The key is to have the things in place already so nobody’s left asking “So, what now?” at a time where there’s no time to decide or plan.